disappointment

friday did not bring us the cheerleading news we had hoped for. i was so afraid of how crushed lacee would be. she has handled it very well. a few tears here and there, but nothing like i expected. i finally sat her down sunday afternoon, told her it was ok to be mad. it is ok to cry. it is ok to be dissappointed. she did admit to all of those feelings. i didnt want her to hold it in and not express herself. granted there is a time and a place for that, and at home with mom is the perfect place. or with a trusted friend. just dont let it bottle up inside and eat at you. that is unhealthy.
another mom critized me for lacee not being excited about the flower i had bought her and offered her after seeing the results of the tryouts. it was a single wrapped rose with a little greenery, and a tiny stuffed tiger attached. granted, had she been chosen for the team, she would have been in a much better mood and much more excited to be given a flower. yet two minutes after learning something you have dreamed about since as long as you can remember is not coming true doesnt put you in the gift receiving mood. i offered it to her, she said she didnt want it, i laid it down. she did not yell at me, she did not shove the flower away or throw it at me or down. i understood.
the next day i told her, that while i totally understood her feelings, she should have simply said thank you and then laid it down. that when you are having a bad day and someone does something nice for you, you should accept it, say thank you, and move on. she teared up, she obviously felt bad. i told her not to worry, i was not mad and she was not in trouble. just for furture reference, she needs to know to handle it a little better. thats all. i dont feel she acted horrid at all. and i wont bring it up again.
lacee and her friends had already had the "we will not be mad at each other no matter the results of tryouts" talk before mark and i asked her to have that talk with her friends. 1 girl out of her elementary school made it. they arent close friends, but they do have classes together. i am proud that they all had that talk without being asked, i think that shows maturity and kindness. i also know how hard that can be when reality sets in, and i am praying that today and the days that follow prove them able to hold to that pact.